There is a nice answer to this question, but it assumes that you have the ANOVA table available.
My problem is different. Say I'm reading a paper describing a male vs female, disease vs control experiment, and I know the n's, means, and standard deviations for all four groups (healthy females, ... , diseased males), but I don't have the original data.
I estimate Cohen d for the sex:health interaction. Numerator: (male_disease-female_disease)-(male_healthy-female_healthy). Denominator: I pool the standard deviations.
In simulations with perfect data (normally distributed, etc), my estimated Cohen d does not match the Cohen d calculated from eta-squared: $$2\sqrt\frac{\eta^2}{1-\eta^2}$$
I am sure there must be a closed-form estimator for Cohen's d for this case, but having looked all over google and online stats books I can't seem to find the answer. Apologies if I've missed something obvious.